In this fun session, we'll review a bunch of problem implementations that have been seen in the real world. Most importantly we will look at why these implementations went horribly wrong so that we can learn from them and never repeat these mistakes again.

This session is a story telling session. In other words, it's stories about what people have done which have gone very, very wrong, usually with predictably horrible results. During this session, we'll publicly (and anonymously) shame them so that everyone else can learn from their mistakes.

If you're looking for demos, well-crafted architecture designs, and proper speaking styles; this is not that session. If, however you want to learn from the horrible mistakes of others in a fast-pasted session, this is the session for you.

You will learn:

• What not to do in SQL Server
• Horrible things people have done in SQL Server
• Please make the pain stop